Tuesday, March 06, 2007

From the Pontifical Office of the Liturgical Police: Liturgy Watch

Vatican City -- Straight from the Pontifical Office of the Liturgical Police a new watch program has been introduced on the local parish level. Father Ron Ronson, Director of the Liturgical Police North America Branch is calling it Liturgy Watch. "Liturgy Watch," said Father Ron "is a program modeled after the successful Neighborhood Watch programs. Except in this case we are applying it to the liturgy." Father Ron then added that the goal of the program is to empower the parishioners to expect and get a properly celebrated liturgical experience free of all distractions and inappropriate activities which might occur in a parish on a local level. "We don't want cookie mass or Barney Blessings. We want an authentic liturgy abuse free" said Father Ron.

In the area of Liturgical Dancing he commented that there was no need to have extraordinary dancing. Father Ronson said that "the liturgy itself is a dance. Why do people feel the need to add extraordinary dancers in the Western Rite I am not sure. I have no real issue with Liturgical dancing, if it can be done appropriately, but 90% is done inappropriately and parishioners are often left feeling awkward and passive -- that is why we use the silhouetted dancer in so many of our items."

Also on hand were the vast array of materials that will be in parishes participating in the first preliminary program.

The "WATCH" sign will be displayed in the parking lots and foyers of all churches participating in the program. It is assumed that the priests in these initial parishes are already celebrating a proper liturgy, so the sign will be more for visiting priests who get the urge to "make it up as they go along."

Handy bulletin inserts to encourage parish participation.

Educational Material will be provided free of charge to all parishes participating in the program. Here is the first edition, which will be made available to all parishioners on the book rack, library, and bathrooms of all churches. Next edition will be titled "Extraordinary Ministers: When it's use and when it's abuse."

Also available, pins to express one's distaste towards an array of abuses. Other pins available: No Cookies and No Barney.


Hidden One said...

It would be more convincing less the spelling mistake - can you find it?

Hint: The word spelled incorrectly is 'church'.

Unknown said...

You didn't mean "chruch" on the blue sign #3 did you?

Anonymous said...

Paul Cat,
I am beginning to see an anti-liturgical dance theme in your postings and I find it disheartening.

Martin Ford Jr. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Martin Ford Jr. said...

That's pretty funny! It's too bad though that reporting anything to your local bishop is sure to get the bishop to be against you. It really blows when your own bishop accepts all this nonsense. God bless.

Sister Brittany said...

Hey - the Curt Jester linked to you! Cool!

This is really very funny. I want the "No Barney" pin. Purple Dinosaurs that claim to love me is just wrong on so many levels.

The Hands And Feet Show said...

Our church does have liturgical dancing and other abuses, but our priest understands them and is slowly taking measures to fix them.

Let's make sure we're patient with our priests and WORK WITH THEM in the parishes to fix them. It's hard to change the mindset of a whole parish, especially a large one.

The Hands and Feet Podcast

Tay Moss said...

Love it!

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...