Saturday, June 30, 2007

Pray Like a Champion

I'll probably get sued for this. I just can't seem to find any signs like this at Notre Dame. I've been told I can buy one somewhere, but I haven't been able to find it anywhere on campus or on the web, so I made one myself. Not large enough to reproduce, but it gets the message across.

Thursday, June 28, 2007

Caption Contest #1: Its Nun-Believable

"Taste Great and Less Filling all in a single can!
Why, that's nun-believable!"

Rethinking Christian Education

I've never been a big fan of how Religious Education programs are structured -- the programs seem to focus too heavily on cognitive knowledge (which isn't a bad thing) without considering who is being taught. I often feel that deep in the back of the the Director's mind he or she seems to be working on the faulty notion of "The kids might not understand it now, but they'll get it later."

My professor today posed this question to the class "Why does religious education fail?"

My initial reaction was that religious education fails because it is educational and often fails to form the entire person.

The Prof. gave a different answer that should make people rethink how they run the RCIA, confirmation, and youth group classes. He said, "The Reason Religious education fails is that we are giving people answers to questions they don't have."

Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Wednesday, June 20, 2007

A Word On Those NEW Translations.

I've been seeing a lot on the blogs lately about the upcoming new translation of the Mass from the Latin to the English, so I though I'd throw my hat in the ring.

The new translations are said to be more literal, but does that mean it is more accurate? I don't know the answer to this question. However, I do hope the translation is richer. Also, I do know that in a number of cases the better translation is often the more poetical translation and not the more literal: "Hold us in your heart" (Exactly how do you hold someone held in a heart?). This is especially true if the aim of what is being read or recited is to move people to action and work (I do believe the liturgy is the 'work of the people', and I do believe we are to go out into the world and work to make the world a Christian culture via the holy Spirit and liturgy.).

I do not mean to apologize for the unnecessary remarks made by certain bishops and cardinals that went to the effect: "We can't use the new translation because everyone is dumb." What I will say is that a literal translation is not always the best translation. Literal translations often have a tendency to be cumbersome, that is, difficult to read and speak, confusing in grammar, syntax, and meaning. Certainly the current translation is not the best we could have, but is this new literal translation going to solve our problems?

I do not see how words like “sullied”, “unfeigned”, “ineffable”, “gibbet”, “wrought”, and “thwart" are going to be problematic. Even with a fifth grade reading level those words should be easy to comprehend with the surrounding context clues of the text. Also, if the person is already familiar with the previous translation and format of the Mass, there should be no problem. Also, there is a great invention called a dictionary that almost all people own. You can use it to look up words like “sullied”, “unfeigned”, “ineffable”, “gibbet”, “wrought”, and “thwart". Besides, have you ever asked a person in RCIA what "begotten" means? You'll be surprised at how many people don't have a clue as to what it means even though they say it every Sunday in mass.

One concern I have is how ecumenical is the new translation? Ok, before you stop reading let me ask the question a different way: How is this new translation going to help bring back into union our separated brothers and sisters? Every article and blog post I have seen on the the new translations seem to think that the new translation is solely about Roman Catholics. It appears to be a very 'me' centered attitude, without even considering what this new translation means for the world. After all, the liturgy is for the sake of the world and not for the sake of one particular rite or group of people. What I mean by this is that there are a number of protestant sects (certain Lutheran, Anglican, Episcopalian, and Presbyterian churches-- to briefly name a few) that use the current Roman English translations of the Greeting, Creed, Gloria, and Sanctus in their own liturgical celebrations by the mere fact that it is used by the Church of Rome and that it is a suitable and good translation -- there are even some Baptist sect that use these translations (if you can believe it).

The denominations that use these translations have adopted them only over the past 30 or so years. What exactly are we saying to these other denominations that are using the current Catholic English translations? Are we extending our hand in friendship welcoming them back home or are we slamming the door in their faces? How difficult is it for a number of protestants to come home to the Catholic Church. How much harder is it for an entire denomination to reunite with Rome! Must we catholics go making it more difficult by issuing revision after revision -- change after change? These new translations aren't about Rome: they are about the world.

Certainly there is a need on a number of levels for a new translation, but the new translation is only going to be successful if it is a good translation, an inspiring translation, a universal translation -- a translation rich with imagery and symbols that speaks not solely to the mind but also to the heart; after all, the church isn't made up of only intellectuals -- my grandmother never graduated high school. Sadly, according to a Professor from the Gregorian in Rome (I do not think it appropriate to mention his name) tells me that the current proposed translation is not a good translation and is in need of work. The problem he says lies in the International Commission on English in the Liturgy (ICEL) and not with the bishops and cardinals. He also mentioned to me that people seem to forget that the primary language of the Liturgy is not the spoken words, but the act itself -- after all, actions speaks louder than words.

Instead of harping on the Bishops and Cardinals who oppose the new translations, why don't we wait patiently and pray for a good translation. It might just be worth it in the long run ... for the sake of the world.

Sunday, June 17, 2007

Worst-Selling Girl Scout Cookies Ever

  • Patty Pavlov's Reward Pellets
  • Prune Shingles
  • and others...
Be sure to see the whole list and graphic over at Simon-Peter Says.

Other you might not want to try:
  • I think its chocolate, but I'm not sure cookies.
  • Child Labor Lemon Bars
  • Haggis Hunks
  • Mustard and Mayonnaise Mayhem
  • Boggers or Brownies?
  • Little round hard things you can't bite into or else chip a tooth cookies.

Friday, June 15, 2007

How do You View Christ and Christians?

Remember, you might be the only Christian a person will ever meet, and first impressions are crucial. At least, it is nice to see that people think nicely of Christ, but it is sad to see how poorly they think of His followers. It really bothers me that people would think that I am crazy, radical, irrational, or extreme by the mere fact that I am Christian. I bet they have never met a real Christian, only people claiming to be Christians.

This Comes from a friend through email, but also via Martha, Martha. Don't forget to check out the Combox on the site too.

Thursday, June 14, 2007

Matrin Luther King Died for This: School of Stupidity Strikes Again

Via Revoloution 21's Blog for the People.

Martin Luther Kind Died for This.

Now I love the city of New Orleans. I grew up there, spent many days and nights in the French Quarter, listened to some of the greatest music every made, and have eaten some of the best food in the country there. Why would people not want to rebuild this great city: this great city that care forgot? After Katrina I scoffed at all those people who didn't want New Orlans to be rebuilt because it was below sea level. Over two years later and after seeing the laughable, shameful, behavior of the politions and the lack of leadership in the city I pose the question: "Why rebuild if the city is going be rebuilt to the same corrupt position it has been all these years?"

Not only is it the city that care forgot, stupidity must in the water there. Where else would a crooked politician be reelected and reelected and reelected by the mere fact that he is a crooked politician.

For example, here are some of the more recent politicians that I remember:
Gov. Blanco -> worst Governor ever. Can't think. Her name describes her mind . . . blank.
Gov. Foster -> not a bad guy.
Gov. Edwin Edwards -> corrupt politician now in Jail. (I will not be surprised if, after his release from prision, that he runs again for governor and gets reelected.)
Gov. Buddy Romer -> No comment.
Mayor Ray Nagan -> The mayor of the New "chocolate city" Orleans. He really needs to learn not to say everything that pops into his head.

Most recently, Congress William (Bill) Jefferson, who likes to use his freezer in which to hid his kickback money -- $90,000 worth. Yet for some reason, the locals reelected him despite his nationally known corrupt ways.

Still local New Orleanians are likening Jefferson to the great civil rights leaders.
"When it's all over, Bill Jefferson will stand up like Booker T. Washington and George Washington Carver. He will stand up in the South and he will be victorious," said the Rev. Samson "Skip" Alexander.
But Jefferson has done nothing to help the African American community in Louisiana.

I am completely dumbfounded, and this makes me want to cry for the great city of New Orelans.

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

A Good Habit to Have: Nuns Drink Beer for Humanity

A Good Habit to Have: Nuns Drink Beer for Humanity

From Story:
Spanish sisters who drank beer for 45 days straight as part of a medical research project are part of a growing trend to study nuns whose unique healthy, celibate lifestyle makes them ideal for such purposes. . . . "We did it for the good of humanity," Sr Almerinda Alvarez told the newspaper El Pais.

If I had know being a religious was this fun and important in the area of scienttific research, I'd hop on board in a second.

Monday, June 11, 2007

We're the goddess

I think I remember seeing a card some time ago in Barns and Nobel's that went something like the above. But man does this bother me. But man is it funny! Yet, I sometimes feel that the theology in America is slowly going down this path.

Mary mother of God pray for us sinners.

BioWillie: Willie Sells Gas

Driving across country provides some interesting finds. Here is one. Willie Nelson is apparently selling Diesel now. Well, I don't know about him, but I just can't wait to get back on the road again. This is NOT a joke.

Saturday, June 09, 2007

New Car Law

Just purchased a NEW 2007 Toyota RAV 4. I wanted to go American, but all the American dealers in the area really let me down. So far I have been enjoying my 4 cylinder purchase and am finding every reason to drive. Need some bread? Why go around the corner when the store 50 miles across town will do just fine?

Anyway, 349 miles after my purchase I began to realize something. I learned something about car dealerships.

We've all heard of Murphy's Law. Well, here is New Car Law.
1. Whichever car you are looking at will be the best selling car in its class. Every dealer will make this claim about every car you test drive. (If this is true than every car has its own class.)
2. According to the dealer you are in, they will have the best prices in town.
3. American cars are better than foreign.
4. Foreign cars are better than American cars.
5. There is never a market in your area for your trade-in vehicle...regardless if you are trading in a nice work truck in a city that is in the process of being rebuilt and work trucks are in demand.
6. Whichever car you test drive, it will surely be the safer than the other models you have looked at...regardless as to what the government test ratings say.
7. Salespersons are hard of hearing. You will say one thing, and they will hear another.
You say, "I would like to look at this Camry over here. I won't be doing any heavy towing nor do I need to move large awkwardly shaped objects. I really don't care what people think of me."
The salesperson hears "Please. Please. Please. I need desperately to purchase the largest truck on the lot. The one with four wheel drive, a winch on the bumper and a monster deer crushing grill plastered on the front. The larger the engine and the lower the EPA the higher up I will be on the cool scale."
8. Young people know nothing and can be taken advantage of . . . the same applies to old people and middle-aged people. This holds more true to the people in midlife crisis.
9. Your credit is never good enough to get that really good interest rate they promise you. Even if all three credit bureaus lists your credit as Excellent and gives you a score of 800. You are wrong, and they are right.
10. Every car dealership is the same. Buy on-line. Less stress and cheaper prices.

If you have any more Laws you would like to add, feel free. This list is of course every short and incomplete.

Friday, June 08, 2007

If Moses Worked for the IRS

I've been doing some reading on tax information from the IRS web site. I'm really glad that God did not give the Ten Commandments to Moses in the same style the IRS writes. The 10 commandments would probably read very differently. Thank God the IRS didn't exist then!

Then again, the IRS probably thinks God works for them.

I guess this only proves that God is simple, while it is humanity that likes to make things complicated.

Wednesday, June 06, 2007


The hug is special to the lonely man locked away in his room.

The white roses are special to the fiancée in a white veil.

The tattered and yellowed poem is special to the lover who received it.

The cake lit with candles is special to the person celebrating his birthday
but is not special by any means to the birthday.

The song is special to the song bird perched in a cage hung by a window
as it is special to the young girl who received it as a gift.

I want to be special to the children of the world
who laugh while playing in the fields,
special as the one who laughs back.

I want to be special in the way a dimpled smile
is special to the lonely stranger.

I want to be special in the way a sole
is special to the shoe
not because it is special
but because it does its task
without seeking praise.

I'm trying to get some practice in for the Ironic Catholic's Second Annual Poetry Contest. Here is a little practice. It might be a little too serious for a humor blog. But who is counting?...

Saturday, June 02, 2007

Where Am I?

Ok, I'm still on my way to NOLA, but stopped in North Carolina at the this amazing summer camp I worked at for a few summers: Camp Kahdalea and Camp Chosatonga.

Why is it so amazing? Just click on the link and find out for yourself.

Part of what makes it so amazing is that you can drive 5 min from the camp and see places like this. (pictures were taken while hiking the Art Lobe trail)

Or this:

Friday, June 01, 2007


Driving to New Orleans, LA from Delaware. Blogging will be scarce for a few days.

Also, it is the start of Hurricane Season. A prayer for the Gulf Coast would be great.

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