Saturday, January 19, 2008

Signs You are Living in a Postmodern World

  1. The light bulbs in your house will last longer than your current relationship (dating or otherwise).
  2. Your car is starting to resemble the home entertainment center in your living room.
  3. You plan to retire…
  4. Your family is no longer your retirement but some guy in a cheap suit with a bad toupee who constantly talks about IRAs and interest rates is.
  5. People no longer have sex, and words no longer have gender.
  6. Socializing with friends or spending time with your family means sitting in a dimly lit room, in silence, staring at a flickering light.
  7. You think love is solely a feeling and emotion and has nothing to do with choice.
  8. You have no notion of how to define “freedom”.
  9. Your name is “Scott Bayo”, you are 46, and you are pregnant.
  10. The warranty on your stove, washer, or other major kitchen appliance will out last the average length of most people’s first marriage.

3 comments:

Brian said...

"Cookies?!" "Who said you could eat my cookies?!"

Carolina Cannonball said...

#9, priceless.

And yes, I have appliances & light bulbs that outlasted my ex-husband. Not too mention they were more reliable and I don't regret the purchase... the appliances that is.

Anonymous said...

Too True, your blog kick's ass. Check out Canada.com's advice on condoms for kids.

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