Monday, January 26, 2009

SMC Monologues

This is interesting. [From Article]
For the fifth year in a row, Saint Mary's College will present "SMC Monologues," a production based off Eve Ensler's "Vagina Monologues," but containing stories written by Saint Mary's students.

Ensler's production brings women's sexuality to the forefront, and the "SMC Monologues" intend to do the same.

"Students have wanted to facilitate discussion about topics relevant to women's sexuality because of the many students' commitment to the goal of raising awareness about issues related to sexual assault," said Catherine Pittman, Saint Mary's psychology professor and advisor to the SMC Monologues.

Saturday, January 17, 2009

What the History Channel has Taught Me About Jesus

  1. He never existed.
  2. He did exist, but he was only a man.
  3. He was gay.
  4. He was a woman.
  5. He was married to Mary of Magdeline (I guess this makes him a lesbian.)
  6. His real father was a Roman soldier named Pantera who secretly knocked up Mary.
  7. He really just repacked Hinduism and Buddhism.
  8. The Gospels are simply the sum total composite image of Christ from the early Christian communities. Therefore he was not God, but was mistaken for being God.
  9. Jesus' divinity was voted upon at the council of Nicaea.
  10. He was from outter space and was the love child of an alien and Mary. Wait no, Mary was abducted, and the aliens implanted Jesus into her womb.
  11. The gospel of Thomas is the most authentic portrayal of Jesus.
  12. He was a sinner.
  13. Show the masses how Satan was just a psychological malady, and if you tell people they are healed they will believe it.
  14. He never raised anyone from the dead. He simply woke them up from some kind of slumber that the ancient Jews mistook for death.
  15. He didn't die on the cross.
  16. He never rose from the dead. This is just a made up story. His followers just stole his body and spread this story because they were too proud and stupid to accept the truth.
  17. He was a failure.
  18. Insert your own thing the History Channel as taught you about Jesus (leave comment in the annotation box.)

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Beethoven Moving At the Speed of Sound

A buddy of mine gave me a CD with this poem on it years ago. I thought it was amazing. I still think it is amazing.

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Elliot, The Magi and the Epiphany

Happy feast of the epiphany. Enjoy this poem by T.S. Elliot

Journey of the Magi
- T.S. Eliot

A cold coming we had of it,
Just the worst time of the year
For a journey, and such a long journey:
The ways deep and the weather sharp,
The very dead of winter.
And the camels galled, sore-footed, refractory,
Lying down in the melting snow.
There were times when we regretted
The summer palaces on slopes, the terraces,
And the silken girls bringing sherbet.
Then the camel men cursing and grumbling
And running away, and wanting their liquor and women,
And the night-fires going out, and the lack of shelters,
And the cities dirty and the towns unfriendly
And the villages dirty and charging high prices:
A hard time we had of it.
At the end we preferred to travel all night,
Sleeping in snatches,
With the voices singing in our ears, saying
That this was all folly.

Then at dawn we came down to a temperate valley,
Wet, below the snow line, smelling of vegetation;
With a running stream and a water mill beating the darkness,
And three trees on the low sky,
And an old white horse galloped away in the meadow.
Then we came to a tavern with vine-leaves over the lintel,
Six hands at an open door dicing for pieces of silver,
And feet kicking the empty wineskins.
But there was no information, and so we continued
And arrived at evening, not a moment too soon
Finding the place; it was (you may say) satisfactory.

All this was a long time ago, I remember,
And I would do it again, but set down
This set down
This: were we led all that way for
Birth or Death? There was a Birth, certainly,
We had evidence and no doubt. I had seen birth and death,
But had thought they were different; this Birth was
Hard and bitter agony for us, like Death, our death.
We returned to our places, these Kingdoms,
But no longer at ease here, in the old dispensation,
With an alien people clutching their gods.
I should be glad of another death.

Monday, January 05, 2009

How to Take Over America

Destroy all cable and satellite TV providers.

Drive through America with large vans telling people you can take them to cable.

Step 3:
As Americans mindlessly pile into the vans in order to watch cable TV know that victory is at hand.
Step 4:
Repeat process with cell phones and internet.

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