St. Lawrence, the early deacon of the Catholic faith who, when commanded by the king to bring to him the treasures of the Church, brought to the king the poor, the sick, and the injured to the king saying, "Here is the wealth of the church." The kind was far less than happy. He ordered the good deacon to be grilled alive. Legends state that after cooking for a while on one side, the deacon quipped, "Turn me over, I'm done on this side." St. Lawrence is the patron saint of Cooks (the Catholic church love irony).
In honor of this holy man. LarryD over at Acts of the Apostasy has made a humorous post of Things NOT said by St. Lawrence. It is worth a read.