Rant: Deceptive Commercials

You ask what it is to be deceived.  Listen to me.  Here I am an expert on the topic, as I have been deceived my whole life, and you have too.

I’ve purchased the tacky bad smelling body spray, hair gel, body wash and shampoo.  I’ve purchased the right kind of cheep bad tasting beer, rum and other liquors.  I’ve purchased the proper cologne.  I’ve purchased the approved tailgating supplies, car and other sports stuff and equipment.  I’ve worn the right clothes and even said the ‘right’ things.  I’ve danced the way I was shown on TV.  I’ve used the crappy infomercial workout equipment that promissed a lean ripped body just from looking at the equipment to which women then flock.

Never have I — and I do mean NEVER — been tackled by or chased by hordes of tall, slim, scantly clad, athletic women for buying the right running shoe or shampoo.  Never have I had tall, dark, scantly, clad women walk up to me and make out with me because I drank the right mixed drink.  Never have women gravitated towards me as if the body spray I used granted me a gravitational pull that only affected beautiful and scantly clad women to come to me, who then found me strangely irresistible.  Never has the Swedish Bikini Team skydived out of a plane then paddled down a river to find me because my friends and I decided to take a poor tasting light beer with us on our paddling trip on the Natahalaya river.  Never has a hot hot woman, who only weighs a  buck-o-five, walked up to me and rub her cheek against my face in a seductive manner for merely shaving with the proper razor and shaving gel.

In short, I have never been rewarded with a beautiful, exotic woman for purchasing a product that according to the commercial should be coming my way for buying a company’s product.  According to all these commercials, I should have troves of women after me at all hours of the day.  Yet, that is not the case.  Many of the commercials I have see on TV portray women as rewards for men . . . like a trophy or ribbon for winning a contest.  That is, the makers of the TV commercials still futher the objectification of women.  “Women aren’t objects” is a message that many boys and girls hear when growing up.  Yet they are constantly presented with this mixed message: buy [this product] and [this objectification of women] will be the fabulous outcome.

Is anyone else slightly bothered by this deception?